- Theme for the Month:
- Love is in the Air! ๐
- The energy of this month is LOVE! I appreciate the energy of love I experience in my relationships with others, all the while remembering that it is far more critical to practice self-love. As I learn to love myself more, I learn to love everyone more. Love flows through me and out into the world, and I watch as it returns to me tenfold.
- Source(s): I Can Do Itยฎ 2022 Calendar: 365 Daily Affirmations
- ๐ฅฐ The Next Person that I AM with is Someone that Explicitly Expresses His Love and Commitment to Me Freely and For Always! ๐น
- ๐ He Is Single and Available and is Ready to Commit! I AM Single and Available, and I Will NOT Settle! ๐บ
- ๐ฅ He will NOT be a Cheater! Liar! Thief! Emotionally Unavailable Narcissist! or Addict!!! ๐ฅ
- Affirmations for the Month:
- ๐น I Am Open and Ready to Give & Receive Love for the Highest Good! ๐
- Only GOOD Enters and Stays in My Life! ๐
- Afformations for the Month:
- ๐ WHY IS MY LIPOMA SURGERY RECOVERY SO EASY, PAIN-FREE, SUCCESSFUL, AND COMPLICATIONS-FREE??!!? ๐
- ๐ Why is it So Easy for My Soulmate and I to Be Healthy, Happy, Wealthy Being Together; and to Be Totally in Love with Each Other? Why Do We Complete Each Other So Easily in the Mind, Body, Spirit, Soul, Sexually and Financially?
- ๐ Why was it So Easy and So Fast for My Perfect Soulmate to Approach Me, and to BE in Perfect Long Lasting Union with Me? ๐ฅฐ
- ๐ Why is it So Easy for 2022 to Be the Best Year of My Life, So Far!? ๐
- ๐ Why AM I So Happy, Healthy, Wealthy, Focused, Lean, Strong, Lucky, Protected and Well-Loved!? ๐
- Focuses for the Quadrimester:
- January: Heal from my Lipoma Surgery! ๐
- February: Join the DivorceCare In-Person Weekly Support Group, and start meeting new friends! ๐ฅฐ
- March: Get our tax preparation in order! ๐ค
- April: File our taxes! ๐ฐ. Start preparing to renew my California Acupuncture License (50 CEU’s before April 2023)! ๐
- Tuesday – 1 – Pace Yourself:
- Pacing yourself is key to loving your life. You can’t expect to be serene if you are constantly hurried and pressured. Pacing yourself boosts your vitality and prevents burnout. Even making micro=shifts in your pacing will improve your energy.
- Intention: I will take a mindful look at the pace of my life and create a more balanced routine. I will avoid rushing and overscheduling myself.
- Affirmation: As I quiet down and focus on the beautiful things in my life, I open myself up to my own healing powers.
- Wednesday – 2 – Physical Movement: The Fountain of Youth:
- Intention: I will move my body every day to strengthen myself and release stress. I will view exercise as a mindful meditation rather than a competitive sprint to the finish line.
- Affirmation: I release whatever I am not using, and polish to a high gloss those things that give me joy!
- Thursday – 3 – the Sacred Ritual of Bathing:
- I wash my body and mind. Clear and shining. Free from dust. Free from stress. Free from fear. Pure and shining. Within and without.
- Intention: I will immerse myself in water and be cleansed of all toxic emotions or stress. I will let water take all my cares away. I will relax into this rejuvenating experience.
- Affirmation: I AM creating lots of room in my life for love! ๐
- Friday – 4 – Simplicity and Minimalism:
- Many empaths are drawn to simplifying their lives to decrease stimulation and reduce sensory overload. Plus, it just feels liberating to not be so busy or have so many possessions.
- You can find happiness more in life itself rather than in accumulating things. Less can be more!
- A [person] is rich in proportion to the number of things [they] can afford to let alone ~ Henry David Thoreau.
- Intention: I will feel how freeing it is to simplify my life by planning fewer activities and letting go of some possessions. I will observe how this opens up time and space so I am better able to enjoy the moment.
- Affirmation: Love opens all doors. I let the love flow through me lavishly, abundantly, and generously! ๐
- Saturday – 5 – Feeling Things Intensely:
- Empaths have sensitive neurological systems that react quickly to input. You experience life passionately, and you’re more unguarded.
- Always plan adequate time for quietude to balance your intensity with calm. Once you embrace your ability to feel deeply, you will attract others who value this quality in you.
- Intention: I will not pretend to be someone I’m not or repress my emotions. I will accept that I have strong feelings. I will seek out people and situations that support my sensitivities.
- Affirmation: All Is Well! and Even Better Things Are Coming My Way!!!
- Sunday – 6 – Being Alone Versus Being Lonely:
- Taking regular periods of alone time is an empath’s salvation. Being alone lets you stop interacting with people and responding to their needs.
- But being lonely feels different from being alone. It is a painful separation from a nurturing source, whether that is self, Spirit, or community. Sometimes, when you are alone, loneliness will arise. Don’t resist it. We all feel lonely at times.
- Whether you experience loneliness a little or a lot, this emotion alerts you to reconnect with a wellspring of love.
- You are never really alone. Spirit is always with you. So, if you’re feeling lonely, then focus on your heart and on Spirit. Also, try reaching out for support rather than simply retreating from the world, as empaths tend to do. Love will help your loneliness subside.
- Intention: I will make room for alone time each day to rejuvenate myself. Feeling lonely reminds me to reunite with love. At those times, I will connect more deeply with Spirit and True friends.
- Affirmation: Today, I give myself the gift of freedom from the past. I move with joy into the now.
- Monday – 7 – Soul Friends:
- Intention: I will be open to finding soul friends with whom I feel a special connection. Even if I donโt have one now, holding this desire in my heart will help draw them in.
- Affirmation: I keep my inner child happy, and I am happy too!
- Tuesday – 8 – An Empath’s Open Heart:
- Empaths are blessed with open, loving hearts. Your emotions run deep, as does our intuition.
- Thriving as an empath means learning to care about yourself as much as you care about the world.
- Though loving so much can hurt too, your heart makes you strong and bright and pure.
- As part of self-care, you must become the protector of your open heart. How? Say NO to anyone who wants to make you small. Practice positive self-talk to reverse your negative thinking.
- I AM enough. I AM loving. I AM growing stronger and more confident!
- Intention: I will value and protect my open heart and choose relationships that support it. My ability to love brings light into my life and the world.
- Affirmation: I release all criticism and only give out that which I wish to receive in return.
- Wednesday – 9 – Marry Yourself:
- The most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself. Nurturing this bond will keep you healthy, happy, and whole.
- Intention: I commit to love, honor, and cherish myself. I will be devoted to my self-care and growth always, whether or not I am in an intimate relationship.
- Affirmation: I am filled with boundless energy. I awaken each morning eager for the new experiences to come!
- Thursday – 10 – Attracting Love:
- A basic law of energy is that you attract who you are. The more love and positivity you emit, the more you will bring to yourself. We are all subtle energy transmitters. We are constantly sending out signals that others on similar frequencies receive.
- Your healing work is to acknowledge your own worthiness. Then you can attract people who are capable of loving.
- When your goal is to treasure yourself and heal any fears that close your heart, love will open its arms to you and satisfy what you have been yearning for.
- Intention: I AM a loving person. I AM worthy of love. I will attract the kind of love that supports my body and my soul!
- Affirmation: I charge a fair price for my services, and everyone around me benefits.
- Friday – 11 – I Want to Love and I Want to Be Alone:
- Intimacy becomes possible for empaths when they can authentically express their needs. A core part of self-care is identifying your intimacy needs and expressing them to your partner. Being authentic paves the way for conscious communication.
- Intention: I will honestly express my empathic needs in a relationship, including my need for downtime and to be alone. I deserve to feel relaxed and happy with a partner.
- Affirmation: I love and accept myself, and I am a magnet for wonderful friendships.
- Saturday – 12 – Don’t Get Seduced by Someone’s “Potential” :
- Recognizing a personโs positive qualities is wonderful. However, to have clarity in your relationships and avoid choosing the wrong people, try to see others for who they are, not who you hope they can become. Itโs easy to be seduced by someoneโs potential, especially for empaths who are thrilled to find the best in others and who think, โMy love can bring out this personโs highest self.”
- However, the reality is often quite different. Although you may be intuiting the real potential in a prospective mate such as a desire for an intimate relationship, you canโt force them to commit. Donโt obsess about how connected you feel to this person or indulge the thought โWith time, they will come around.โ They need to have some emotional awareness and desire for introspection so they can do the ongoing inner work of relationships. Releasing the fantasy of what could be will keep you from losing years trying to improve someone and being hurt in the process.
- Intention: I will not get fooled by someoneโs โpotential.โ I will not keep hoping that someone will change or get lost in a fantasy of who they could become.
- Affirmation: Water is my favorite beverage. It replenishes and refreshes me, and just makes me feel good.
- Sunday – 13 – Feeling Safe to Open Your Heart :
- The way someone treats others reflects how they will treat you once the bliss of the honeymoon phase fades. Behavior is more trustworthy than words.
- Intention: I will be open to a positive relationship with someone who can reciprocate my caring. I will be with someone who can both give and receive love.
- Affirmation: Long-lasting, loving relationships brighten my life.
- Monday – 14 – The Sacredness of Committment :
- One of the most sacred actions you can take is to commit to the power of love. Valentineโs Day is an auspicious opportunity to do this.
- I commit to living a life based on love, not fear. I commit to being loving with myself. I commit to my own spiritual growth, honor my feelings, and to speak my truth.
- Intention: I will not be afraid to commit to what I love. I will let my love flow freely. I want to be totally present for the moments of my life.
- Affirmation: I can work miracles in my life and begin to do so NOW!
- Tuesday – 15 – The Three-Minute Heart Meditation:
- Intention: Practice meditation each day to center myself, release stress, and cultivate loving-kindness. It is a practical form of self-care that I can use many times a day.
- Affirmation: My talents are in demand, and my unique gifts are appreciated by those around me.
- Wednesday – 16 – Boundaries and Intimacy:
- Boundaries protect you and help you feel safe. Without them, you might start resenting a behavior that annoys you about your partner, or you might get exhausted from giving too much to a friend.
- Internalizing stress is a setup for developing physical symptoms, depression, and anxiety.
- Creating boundaries is good for your health and your relationships, but it takes practice. Do it with kindness, without being confrontational.
- Set one boundary at a time rather than tackling many at once. Speaking up will create a more honest and happier relationship.
- Intention: I will practice setting a boundary today. I will begin with an easy issue rather than one with an intense emotional charge. I will also start with a supportive person rather than asserting myself with my father or my boss.
- Affirmation: I appreciate and care for my body. My cells have eternal youth!
- Thursday – 17 – Suffocation vs Abandonment:
- Intention: I will appreciate the fine line between feeling suffocated and feeling abandoned. I will convey my personal space needs and how much interaction feels good. This will help me have closer relationships.
- Affirmation: I Love Life! I look forward to every moment!
- Friday – 18 – The Difference Between Lust and Love:
- Lust is driven by the primal urge to procreate.
- Love can involve physical attraction, but you also want to get to know someone. This intimacy keeps deepening and leads to better sex. You listen to each otherโs feelings and priorities. Love is about genuinely caring for someone and becoming good friends rather than simply a physiological โhigh.โ At the start of a relationship you may feel lust along with the beginnings of love. However, enduring love isnโt based on idealization or projection. Real love is proven over time. Itโs something you must live into.
- Intention: I will know the difference between lust and love. This will protect my sensitivities and keep my expectations of a potential partner realistic. I will always ask myself if my tender heart feels safe in a romantic situation.
- Affirmation: For every problem that I may create, I am confident that I can find a solution.
- Saturday – 19 – There is No Such Thing as Casual Sex :
- When you touch someone, energy is communicated. Since empaths are so sensitive to energy, there is no such thing as casual sex. You can absorb a partnerโs stress, fear, and happiness into your own body. You may also receive intuitions about their thoughts and feelings. Sex is always an energy exchange. A lot of nonverbal information comes through physical contact.
- Intention: I will remember that intimate contact conveys powerful energy. I will make wise choices about my physical relationships.
- Affirmation: I now release all inner resistance and doubt. I trust Life.
- Sunday – 20 – Sleeping Alone or Together:
- Intention: I will create sleeping arrangements that feel comfortable to me. I will not suffer silently when sound or movement disrupts my sleep. I will honestly discuss this issue with my partner.
- Affirmation: I do not struggle alone in the wilderness of life. Whenever I need help, I ask.
- Monday – 21 – Release Your Partner’s Stress :
- Intention: I will have a plan for dealing with my partnerโs stress. I will be prepared to center myself and hold a loving space for them, but I donโt see it as my job to fix their problems.
- Affirmation: My garden of affirmations is bearing fruit.
- Tuesday – 22 – Stop Controlling People:
- A way to let go of control is to detach with love. You can hold loving thoughts for someone but allow them to live and learn at their own pace, including making their own mistakes.
- Intention: I will let others lead their own lives. I will address my own anxiety when I become overcontrolling. I will let go and turn the results of a situation over to Spirit.
- Affirmation: Love is the miracle cure. Loving myself works miracles in my life.
- Wednesday – 23 – Soulmate or Cell Mate?:
- Intention: I will have realistic expectations of a soul mate and not think of them as my savior. I will take responsibility for my own growth. I want to heal anything in myself that keeps me from loving.
- Affirmation: I only choose thoughts that create a wonderful future, and I move into it Now!
- Thursday – 24 – Living Comfortably with Unresolved Problems:
- Intention: If I reach a block in communicating with someone, I will take a rest rather than forcing the topic. I will have faith that my intuition and the universe will help us find the answers.
- Affirmation: My personality is flexible; it is easy for me to change. My inner being is consistent. I am always safe.
- Friday – 25 – Communicating with a Non-Empath:
- Intention: I will educate my loved ones about my experience as an empath. I will be patient and not overload them with too much information at once. I will answer their questions and let them assimilate what Iโm sharing in their own time.
- Affirmation: I have faith in the unlimited loving power of the Universe.
- Saturday – 26 – A Light Touch in Relationships:
- Intention: I donโt have to work so hard in relationships. I donโt have to be overly serious. I will breathe more and ask Spirit for assistance.
- Affirmation: On the highway of Life, I find my way easily.
- Sunday – 27 – You Don’t Need to Be Perfect :
- Intention: As I keep growing, I will appreciate my progress. I will not be fooled by the illusion of perfection. I will accept my whole self and know that I am a fantastic work in progress.
- Affirmation: I exercise because it is not only good for me, but also fun!
- Monday – 28 – Navigating Social Situations:
- Intention: To relieve the pressure in social situations, I will recognize my empathic needs and act on them. I donโt have to be stuck in situations that Iโm uncomfortable with.
- Affirmation: I choose to feel good about myself, today and every day!
Month: February 2022
๐บ Chapter 8 – Developing an Inner Sense of Safety
- Theme / Agenda for the Chapter:
- Developing an Inner Sense of Safety
- Affirmations / Quotes for the Chapter:
- ๐ I AM Safe and Protected!
- Introduction:
- Being safe in the external environment is a major initial goal in therapy for traumatized people who are still threatened in their present-day life.
- However, even though many traumatized people are (relatively) safe in their environment, they still do not feel safe. Thus, a major goal in therapy is to establish a sense of inner safety, of being safe with yourself, all parts of yourself, with your inner experiences.
- An inner sense of safety, also referred to as a safe state (OโShea, 2009), is the awareness of feeling relaxed and calm in the present moment, when there is no actual threat or danger.
- 1. Developing an Inner Sense of Safety:
- Inner safety is strongly related to being able to be present in the here and now, and in feeling secure in at least one or two trusting relationships with other people.
- Traumatized individuals often do not feel safe with their own inner experiences, that is, with some of their own emotions, thoughts, sensations, and other actions of dissociative parts.
- Subsequent avoidance of inner experience makes it hard to stay present, and it sets in motion an inner cycle of fear, criticism, and shame, adding yet more to a lack of inner safety.
- If the concept of โsafetyโ seems too foreign to you, you may think instead of a pleasant and calm place, a place where you feel understood and accepted, or perhaps a place where you are alone and know you will not be disturbed.
- 2. Ways to Create a Sense of Inner Safety:
- a. Being in the Present:
- You can train yourself to consciously let go of inner tension, to allow all parts of you to notice this moment of safety and well-being, of relaxation and inner quiet, even though at first these moments may be few and far between.
- A sense of safety can occur when all parts of you can agree to at least temporarily let go of inner conflicts and criticism and to focus on the present moment.
- This may be difficult to achieve and may not last long in the beginning, but you will find that all parts of you appreciate this state, and the more you practice, the easier it will become.
- b. Developing Imaginary Inner Safe Places:
- Individuals with a dissociative disorder typically experience a vicious cycle of rage, shame, fear, and hopelessness inside that contributes to a lack of inner safety.
- Some parts are angry and critical, while others are hurting, afraid, or ashamed. There are often strong conflicts among these different parts. The more parts express their pain, the angrier and more hurtful other parts become, because they cannot tolerate what they consider to be โweakness.โ
- The more angry and critical parts are toward other parts, the more these parts suffer. This creates an endless loop of inner misery and lack of safety.
- Angry parts feel some relief once they learn that terrified or hurting parts are quieter when they feel safer.
- Thus, you are able to reduce conflict by helping both types of parts simultaneously. Once you are able to develop an inner imaginary safe space, all parts of you can experience it and have it available anytime you need or want.
- For example, when some parts of the personality are overwhelmed, and you need to accomplish an important task, these parts may go to the safe place to rest while you complete your task.
- Such parts may feel calmer in an imaginary safe place until such time that they can focus on their healing during therapy.
- Some people find that one imaginary place is sufficient for all parts of themselves, while others feel the need for different places that match the differing needs of parts. And of course, inner safe places should always be paired with efforts to ensure your safety with other people and in the world. You cannot have an inner sense of safety without actually being safe!
- 3. Example of Imaginary Inner Safe Place:
- Although technically not spaces, some people like the image of protective covering: space suit, suit of armor, invisible force field, invisible cloak (for more of this type of imagery, see โThe Storeโ exercise in chapter 14).
- 4. Your Safe Place:
- You may want a safe (or quiet) place for all parts of yourself together, or some parts may want their own place. Pay close attention to what various parts of you want or need. Remember that imagination is limitless and can be continually adapted as your needs change.
- Remember that a prime rule is not to criticize or judge parts for what they imagine, and for what they want or need, even if you do not agree. Perhaps not all parts of you can yet participate; that is fine. Just start where you are able.
- A safe place should be a private place that only you know about, and that no one else can find or intrude upon without your permission. If you feel especially unsafe, you can imagine that your place is surrounded by a fence, a wall, a special invisible field, or an alarm system.
- You are in charge of whether you allow other people there. You can also negotiate with all parts to respect each otherโs places and not intrude or โvisitโ without permission.
- Feel free to add anything you want in this place to improve your sense of comfort, well-being, and safety.
- Any part of you may go to a safe place at any time. Some parts may voluntarily go to a safe place when there has been some inner collaboration and agreement that this might provide temporary relief or containment. However, never try to shut away or hide parts to get rid of them!
- A literal safe place at home is also important for many people. You can create a special room or corner of a room that represents your safe place. You may add items to this place that represent safety and calm to you. Choose colors and textures that are pleasant or quieting, objects that have a positive meaning to you, photographs of people who care about you, or of places that you find pleasant.
- 5. Homework:
- a. Developing an Inner Sense of Safety and Safe Places
- Thoughts:
- Miscellaneous:
6. Heart Chakra
Awaken Your Heart Chakra Healing Music (5 mins)
Heart Chakra Activation and Balancing (15 mins)
Heart Chakra Healing Guide: 7 Chakra Store
Heart Chakra Healing: Chakras.info
Heart Chakra
Source(s):
Photo: by Chakra Healing
http://www.chakrahealing.com/blog/heart-chakra-healing/
ArtsElemental
http://artselemental.deviantart.com/art/Heart-Chakra-321821925
๐บ A Beautiful Mistake (็พ้บ็้ฏ่ชค)
A Beautiful Mistake
~ ๅ ๅคฉ็ฉ (Rachel Fu)
ๅฏง้ก่ตฐๅฐ่ฟท่ทฏใไนไธๅปๅจไนๅฟ่ทณ็้ๅบฆ
็ฎไธ็ฎๆฏไธ็จฎ้ ๆใ่ฆ็็ๆๅพๆ้บผไปๅบ
ๅคฉ็ฉบ้ฃไธไบ่้งใไฝ้ ญๅ่ฌไบๅฅไบบ็่พ่ฒ
ไธๆ็ด ็ซ็ฐไธๆฏๅ จ้จใๆๅป็บไบๆ็กๅ็ๆผๅบ
ไธ้ก้ๅงใๆฏๅฎณๆ็ตๆใๆๅ้ฝ็กๅใๅๆๅพ็ฒ็ฎ
็พ้บ็้ฏ่ชคใๅ จ้ฝๆฏๅ ็บๆ็้็จๅคช่พ่ฆ
็พ้บ็้ฏ่ชคใๆ่ฑ็ตๆผไธ็พๅปๅง็ต่็ก
็พ้บ็้ฏ่ชคใๆๅ็ๆ ไบๅช่ฎๅๆถ่จไฝ
็พ้บ็้ฏ่ชคใ็ต็ฉถ้ๆฏ่ฆ็ฟๆ
ฃใๆๅคฉ็ๅญค็จ
๐น My Dearest! ๐ ๆๆ่ฆชๆ็ ~ ๅผตๆ ๅฆน A-Mei ๐ท
๐น My Dearest ๐
~ ๅผตๆ ๅฆน
ๅพๆณ็ฅ้ไฝ ่ฟๆณ I really want to know how youโre doing recently
ๆ่ฝไบบ่ชฌ้ไธๅฆไฝ ๅฐๆ่ฌ Hearing about it from other people, how about you tell me sometime
็ถ้้ฃๆฎต้บๆพ After that period of regret
่ซไฝ ๆพๅฟใๆ่ฎๅพๆดๅ ๅ
ๅผท Please be assured, Iโve gotten stronger
ไธ็ไธ็ฎกๆๆจฃ่ๆถผ No matter how desolate the world is
ๆ้ไฝ ๅฐฑไธๆๅญคๅฎ Thereโs no reason to fear loneliness as long as I’ve loved you
ๆๆ่ฆชๆ็ใไฝ ้็ๆ้บผๆจฃ My dearest one, how have you been?
ๆฒๆ็ๆฅๅญใไฝ ๅฅไพ็กๆ Those days without me, how have you been since?ไพ็ถ่ฆชๆ็ใๆๆฒ่ฎไฝ ๅคฑๆ Still, my dear, I have not let you down
่ฎๆ่ฆชไธ่ฆชใๅ้ๅปไธๆจฃ Let me kiss you for a while, just like what we would used to do
ๆๆณไฝ ไธๅฎๅๆญก I think you must like the fact that
็พๅจ็ๆๅญธๆไบไฝ ๆๆ็้ๆ I’ve learned to be more cheerful lately
ๆณ่ตทไฝ ็ๆจกๆจฃ Now that I think of your face
ๆไป้บผ้ฏ What other mistakes are there
้ไธ่ฝๅค ่ขซๅ่ซ That canโt be forgiven?
ไธ็ไธ็ฎกๆๆจฃ่ๆถผ No matter how desolate the world is
ๆ้ไฝ ๅฐฑไธๆๅญคๅฎ Thereโs no reason to fear loneliness as long as I’ve loved you
ๆๆ่ฆชๆ็ใไฝ ้็ๆ้บผๆจฃ My dearest one, how have you been?
ๆฒๆ็ๆฅๅญใไฝ ๅฅไพ็กๆ Those days without me, how have you been since?ย ไพ็ถ่ฆชๆ็ใๆๆฒ่ฎไฝ ๅคฑๆ Still, my dear, I have not let you down
่ฎๆ่ฆชไธ่ฆชใๅๆๅไธๆจฃ Let me kiss you for a while, just like what friends would do
้็ถ้ข้ไบไฝ ็ไธ็ Although time in the world after leaving you
ๆฏไธ่ตท้ๆผซ้ท Seems longer than the times weโve been together
ๆๅ็ธฝ่ฝ่ฃๅ We can always make it up
ๅ ็บไธญ้็ฉบ็ฝ็ๆๅ
Because the empty times in between
ๅฆๆ้่ฝๅไบซ If that can still be shared
ไนๆฏไธ็จฎๆตชๆผซ Itโs also romanticโฆ
้ไฟ้็ถไธๅไธๆจฃ Although this relationship is no longer the same
้ๅฟๅปๆ้บผ่ฝ่ชชๆทๅฐฑๆท How is it possible to terminate our care for each other completely?
ๆๆ่ฆชๆ็ใไฝ ้็ๆ้บผๆจฃ My dearest one, how have you been?
ๆฒๆ็ๆฅๅญใไฝ ๅฅไพ็กๆ Those days without me, how have you been since?ย ไพ็ถ่ฆชๆ็ใๆๆฒ่ฎไฝ ๅคฑๆ Still, my dear, I have not let you down
่ฎๆ่ฆชไธ่ฆชใๅ่ฆชไบบไธๆจฃ Let me kiss you for a while, like what a family member would do
ๆๆ่ฆชๆ็ใไฝ ้็ๆ้บผๆจฃ My dearest one, how have you been?
ๆฒๆ็ๆฅๅญใไฝ ๅฅไพ็กๆ Days without me, how are you since we parted?ไพ็ถ่ฆชๆ็ใๆๆฒ่ฎไฝ ๅคฑๆ Still, my dear, I have not let you down
่ฎๆ่ฆชไธ่ฆชใๅ้ๅปไธๆจฃ Let me kiss you for a while, just like what we would used to do
English Translation Source(s): http://windcglider.blogspot.com/2011/05/lyrics-translations-my-dearest-by-mei.html
๐ Scars in Heaven ๐
Thank you God, for healing my physical, emotional and spiritual wounds.
Thank you for healing the physical, emotional, and spiritual wounds of my loved ones ~ past and the present. AMEN.
Scars in Heaven
~ Casting Crowns
If I had only known the last time would be the last time
I would’ve put off all the things I had to do
I would’ve stayed a little longer, held on a little tighter
Now what I’d give for one more day with you
‘Cause there’s a wound here in my heart where something’s missing
And they tell me that it’s gonna heal with time
But I know you’re in a place where all your wounds have been erased
And knowing yours are healed is healing mine
The only scars in Heaven, they won’t belong to me and you
There’ll be no such thing as broken, and all the old will be made new
And the thought that makes me smile now, even as the tears fall down
Is that the only scars in Heaven are on the hands that hold you now
I know the road you walked was anything but easy
You picked up your share of scars along the way
Oh, but now you’re standing in the sun, you’ve fought your fight and your race is run
The pain is all a million miles away
The only scars in Heaven, they won’t belong to me and you
There’ll be no such thing as broken, and all the old will be made new
And the thought that makes me smile now, even as the tears fall down
Is that the only scars in Heaven, yeah, are on the hands that hold you now
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, for the hands that hold you now
There’s not a day goes by that I don’t see you
You live on in all the better parts of me
Until I’m standing with you in the sun, I’ll fight this fight and this race I’ll run
Until I finally see what you can see, oh-oh
The only scars in Heaven, they won’t belong to me and you
There’ll be no such thing as broken, and all the old will be made new
And the thought that makes me smile now, even as the tears fall down
Is that the only scars in Heaven are on the hands that hold you now
๐ ๐ ๐ Over You!!! ๐๐๐
I AM Still Hurting! My Heart is Still Breaking! I did not think it would hurt this bad!
It has just been one betrayal after another! I just found out last Sunday (01/30/22) that my ex-husband not only stole money from our joint bank accounts, but he took up a huge loan and gave a 6-digit amount of money to a woman!!!!!
This sense of betrayal hurts so bad!!! I restored his poor credit score at the expense of mine to become excellent, and that was the only reason he was able to get a loan approved for such a large amount! I feel like a Fool! an Idiot! a Moron! What was I thinking?!!!
He has constantly lied to me, cheated on me and betrayed me for the past 13.5 years. Yet, I still forgave him, believed in him, loved him, cared for him, even up to this day. How can I be So Foolish!!!!!
We were no longer in love with each other since a long time ago, but I’ll always love him as a family member. But what he has done is an act of Ultimate Betrayal! I have been asking so many times for the past 2 months as to what loan he was applying for, and for what? But he was adamant to take that secret with him to his grave.
It was only until his mission was completed, by giving the entire amount to that woman, and by me threatening to speak with his boss, before he finally told me about it last Sunday. I have realized what a sick personality he has. There was no way to stop him from completing his mission. Once his mind is set on something, good or bad, he will get it done, one way or another. I still don’t even know if he was telling me the truth about where the money went. His story seems so unbelievable! Only an imbecile, and someone who was actively having a psychotic episode would do what he said he has done.
Even people who get scammed gets scammed that large amount of money after at least a year of being fooled. He got scammed in less than three months????? And what about the “Promise Ring Princess-Cut Diamond” that he was doing a Google search for not long ago? A few days later, he did a Google search for “Engagement Ring”. What was that all about?????? He is a Pathological liar! All I know for a fact is that all that money is gone! As to where it has gone to, I still do not know for a fact!
He just recently texted me, “You are irrelevant to me”. This is truly how he feels about me. He does not give a shit about me or how I feel. It has always been about him, and it always will.
He has no gratitude whatsoever for all that I have done for him for the past 13.5 years. All the sacrifices I’ve made for him, so that he is this high-earning medical device engineer that has been able to keep a good reputation in his field; despite being an alcoholic, who drinks and drives, cheats on his wife, and can not even get a credit card approved, because he does not take responsibility for anything outside of his work.
His debt collectors started contacting me after we got married, because he never answers the phone to them. I settled his debts! What did he tell me last Sunday? He said that he gave all that money away for a good purpose, now his life has a purpose, to pay off his loan. What an idiot!!!!! Why did I ever settle his debt on his behalf????? Obviously, his life needs to be in constant turmoil in order for him to feel alive! Why didn’t I just let him keep his lousy debts and poor credit score, so that he can never get another credit card or loan approved?????!!!!!! WHY?????!!!!!!!!
Not long after I moved in with him, our electricity got cut off one day due to his non-payment. I frantically called him to tell him that. He told me not to worry, that it has happened before!!!! It has happened before???!!!! I should have known back then what kind of irresponsible jerk I am dealing with!
After we started dating, he told me that I made him want to become a better person. Yeah, right! Of course! I settled his debts, got his credit score to excellent, drove him around like his chauffeur (when his driver’s license got revoked twice after we were together!) while being yelled at for having no sense of direction, took care of his health issues, and was treated only as his executive assistant and housekeeper. And all this for what? For him to screw me over again, and again, and again for the past 13.5 years!!!
He is Jekyll and Hyde. You’ll want to have him as your employee or independent contractor. But you WILL NOT want to have him in your personal life. He will destroy your sense of dignity, self-worth, and he will destroy your health and well-being. He will make you feel like you are insignificant, and not even worth existing on this earth!
This is the act of Ultimate Betrayal! To have total disregard for my future and my financial future, whatsoever! I don’t know how many coupons I’ve clipped throughout the past 13.5 years, just to save us a dollar here and there. Yet, this inconsiderate, cruel, cold-hearted moron threw away all that money in an instant, as if it was trash. Just like that! To a stranger that he claims he just met in November last year! He has betrayed me in every single way possible. He made sure of that!!!
This hurts so bad! My heart hurts so bad! This hurts so bad!!! ๐
๐ OVER YOU!!! ๐
~ Daughtry
Now that it’s all said and done
I can’t believe you were the one
To build me up then tear me down
Like an old abandoned house
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath
I fell too far, was in way too deep
Guess I let you get the best of me
Well, I never saw it coming
I should’ve started running
A long, long time ago
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I’m slowly getting closure
I guess it’s really over
I’m finally getting better
And now I’m picking up the pieces
And spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you
You took a hammer to these walls
Dragged the memories down the hall
Packed your bags and walked away
There was nothing I could say
And when you slammed the front door shut
A lot of others opened up
So did my eyes, so I could see
That you never were the best for me
Well, I never saw it coming
I should’ve started running
A long, long time ago
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I’m slowly getting closure
I guess it’s really over
I’m finally getting better
And now I’m picking up the pieces
And spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you
Well, I never saw it coming
I should’ve started running
A long, long time ago
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
Well, I never saw it coming
I should’ve started running
A long, long time ago
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I’m slowly getting closure
I guess it’s really over
I’m finally getting better
And now I’m picking up the pieces
And spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
(Whoa-whoa-whoa)
Well, now I’m putting my heart back together
(Whoa-whoa-whoa)
‘Cause I got over you
(Whoa-whoa-whoa)
I got over you
And I got over you
‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you
๐น Cora Rose ~ What an Inspiration! ๐ฉ ๐ฅ Forgive, but DO NOT FORGET!!! ๐ฅ
Update: 02/03/22:
After many times of asking, literally begging, my ex-husband as to what is going on regarding our finances, I finally found out last Sunday (01/30/22) that not only did he withdraw the huge amounts of money from our joint bank accounts since the beginning of November 2021, but he also took out a huge loan in the past few months. He gave all that money to a woman!!!
When we got married 13.5 years ago, his credit was so poor, he could not even get a credit card approved. Even though he was making good money, but he never paid off his credit card debts. Due to that, 4-digit debts became 5-digits, thanks to compound interest and time. That’s how he is in life; hiding his head in the sand, until he goes through a manic phase, and then all of a sudden:
a. either get himself into another DUI, so that he will now have to pay lots of money each month to the state, for his DUI classes, and for his expensive car insurance rate
b. take up loan on money that he does not have, and give all that away, just like that, to a woman!
c. buy expensive, useless gadgets
I told him last Sunday that I went through 13.5 years of helping him with his issues: drinking addiction, DUI’s, cheating on me, debts, poor credit score, brain tumor (which was later found to be a congenital anomaly), without getting much money left in the proposed divorce settlement, especially compared to how much he gave to that woman in just less than 3 months! And here is this stranger that he interacted with since November 2021, that he ends up throwing all his money away, even money that he doesn’t have, without her having to ever lift a finger for him!!!!!!
I should have never sacrificed my own credit score (by opening multiple credit cards and adding him as an additional card holder) to make his credit score become excellent (and mine not as good since my credit score gets lowered each time my credit gets run, in order to apply for a credit card, or to start a utility service under my name, etc.). If I just left him with his poor credit score, where he could not even get approved for a credit card, then he would not have been able to get approved for a loan, especially for this huge amount!
I’ve realized that I have been enabling him all these years. He never had to suffer from the long term consequences for his actions (DUI’s, alcohol addiction, not paying off his debts, etc.) and I basically sacrificed my own health and well-being for nothing for the past 13.5 years, since he is still drinking and driving, and now have this huge loan debt!
What a joke! The joke is on me! You can not save someone that does not want to be saved! This is the biggest and most painful lesson I have learned in my life!
Update: 01/27/22 – Both of my Covid and Flu nasal swabs came back negative. Woohoo! ๐ค
Life Is Beautiful!!! ๐
01/26/22
I’ve been going through a tough two months since the beginning of December 2021.
First, my soon to be ex-husband’s car got totaled on December 4th, 2021. Right afterwards, I found 1 can of empty beer and 3 cans of unopened beers inside his backpack that he brought back from the accident. Then he told me that had been drinking again since a year ago, and then he asked me for a divorce.
A few days later, I found out that he had been secretly withdrawing huge amounts of money from our bank accounts since the beginning of November, and even a few days after he said that he wanted a divorce.
Not soon thereafter, I went for my lipoma surgery on December 22nd, and was in a lot of pain and discomfort especially after the first two weeks. Then, I was in extreme stomach pain, passed out and vomited on January 13th, 2022. Thank goodness, it happened while I was inside my ex’s room with him helping me to apply the pressure bandage onto my lipoma surgical site. He doesn’t ever check up on me (he spends his spare time either getting drunk, or getting over his hangover), so if it happened at any other time, then I would have chocked on my own vomit and died. My ex would have probably eventually walked into my room 3 days later when he smelled my decomposing body.
On January 15th, in the evening, my EMDR therapist (that I last saw on January 12th), called to tell me that she tested positive for Covid, and started having symptoms on January 13th. So, I was definitely in close contact with her during her infectious period.
I went for my MRI/MRA brain and cervical scans on January 24th and saw the report yesterday from my MRI brain scan that I have white spots in my brain, which may indicate that I have had a stroke, have MS, have Lyme disease, or have a brain tumor, etc. I also had a MRI brain scan done 3 years ago after my concussion (slipped and fell on ice) but did not have white spots in the brain show up back then. So, something definitely happened to me in the past 3 years.
When I went into my ex’s bedroom last night to help me apply the pressure bandage to my lipoma surgical site, I found that he hid a bottle of hard liquor in his room. Once again, I’ve asked him to please consider getting counseling for his addiction.
I woke up this morning feeling extremely fatigued. I plan on getting tested for Covid this afternoon with my primary doctor. I have auto-immune issues, so I’m hoping that if I test positive, then he will be willing to prescribe to me Covid anti-viral medications.
I just can’t seem to catch a break. It’s been one shitty thing after another since the beginning of December last year. I’ve been trying to stay positive all this time but it’s starting to wear down on me now.
I just saw this video now of this brave sweet puppy, Cora Rose. She is my inspiration that even in the worst of times, you can still be the happiest person alive. The key is to be grateful for what you have in life. I will continue to watch inspirational videos and continue to practice my daily gratitude practice.
๐งจ Happy Chinese New Year! ๐
๐ May 2022 Be the Best Year of Our Lives, So Far! May We All Be Blessed with Health, Love, Joy, Wealth, Luck, Protection and Happiness! ๐
Singer: Liu Yu Ning (ๅๅฎๅฏง)
Title: ้ๅนด็ๆญ (Guo Nian De Ge) – Happy New Year Song!
Du du Du~
็ฅๆๅนธ็ฆ ็ฅไฝ ้ๅฟ
zhu wo xingfu zhu ni kaixin
Du du Du~
ๆฐๅนดๅฐ ๆฐๅนดๅฅฝ
xinnian dao xinnian hao
ๅๆฏไธๅนดๆฅไพๆฉ
you shi yi nianchun lai zao
ไฝ ๅฐ้ไธๅฅๆ่
ni dui zhe yiju anhao
ๆๆ็ด
ๅ
ๆบๅๅฅฝ
wo ba hongbao zhunbei hao
ไฝ ไฝๆ ๆๆๆฑ
ni zuoyi wo yongbao
ๅฅฝไน
ไธ่ฆๅฏ้ๅฅฝ
haojiu bujian ke hai hao
ไธๅฃๆนฏๅๆๆฐด้ค
yikou tangyuan huo shuijiao
้ฝๆฏๅๅ็ๅณ้
dou shi tuanyuan de weidao
ๆญๅๆญๅไฝ ๅ
gongxi gongxi ni ya
ๆ้ๅป้ๅปๆ็ฆฎไบ
wo zhe xiang zhe xiang you lile
็ฆฎๅค่ชฐไนไธ็ฎ่ฆๅค
li duo shui ye bu suan jian wai
ๅ็
งๅฐฑ็ฌๅฎๅ้ๆท
hezhao jiu xiao ta ge kaihuai
ๆญๅๆญๅไฝ ๅ
gongxi gongxi ni ya
ๆฒๆ็
ฉๆฑๆๆพไฝ ๅข
meiyou fannao darao ni ne
ๅฟซๆจไธ็ด่ๆจๅๅจ
kuaile yizhi yu nin tong zai
ๅฅฝ้ๆปพๆปพไพ
haoyun gungun lai
่ชชไธๅฅๆญๅๆญๅ
shuo yiju gongxi gongxi
ไธๅฎๆๅฆๆๅฆๆ
yiding hui ruyi ruyi
ๅไนๆฏ่ชช
o yeshi shuo
ๆๆ่ไฝ
wo aizhe ni
ๆฏไธๅฅๅๅๅๅ
mei yiju tong xi tong xi
ๆ่ฌๆๆไฝ ๆไฝ
ganxie wo you ni you ni
ๅๅจไธ่ตท
o zai yiqi
ๆฏๆๅผๅพๆญกๅ็ไธป้ก
shi zui zhide huanxi de zhuti
็ฆ่ฆๅ ็ฆไพไบ
fu yao dao fu laile
ๆปฟๆปฟ็ฆๆฐฃ่ซๆฅๅฅฝ
man man fuqi qing jie hao
ๅพๆ่ๅฎถ็้ๅฃ
cong wo laojia de menkou
่ฒผๅฐchina town่ก่ง
tie dao china town jiejiao
ๅฅๅซๅค ๅฅๅซๅต
bie xian duo bie xian chao
ๆฟ้ๆๆฉ้้ป่
ฆ
na kai shou jiguan diannao
ไปๆ็ฌไธๅ้ๅฎต
jin wan ao yige tongxiao
ๆๅคฉ่ถ้็็ฑ้ฌง
mingtian ganji kan renao
ๆญๅๆญๅไฝ ๅ
gongxi gongxi ni ya
ๆ้ๅป้ๅปๆ็ฆฎไบ
wo zhe xiang zhe xiang you lile
็ฆฎๅค่ชฐไนไธ็ฎ่ฆๅค
li duo shui ye bu suan jian wai
ๅ็
งๅฐฑ็ฌๅฎๅ้ๆท
hezhao jiu xiao ta ge kaihuai
ๆญๅๆญๅไฝ ๅ
gongxi gongxi ni ya
ๆฒๆ็
ฉๆฑๆๆพไฝ ๅข
meiyou fannao darao ni ne
ๅฟซๆจไธ็ด่ๆจๅๅจ
kuaile yizhi yu nin tong zai
ๅฅฝ้ๆปพๆปพไพ
haoyun gungun lai
่ชชไธๅฅๆญๅๆญๅ
shuo yiju gongxi gongxi
ไธๅฎๆๅฆๆๅฆๆ
yiding hui ruyi ruyi
ๅไนๆฏ่ชช
o yeshi shuo
ๆๆ่ไฝ
wo aizhe ni
ๆฏไธๅฅๅๅๅๅ
mei yiju tong xi tong xi
ๆ่ฌๆๆไฝ ๆไฝ
ganxie wo you ni you ni
ๅๅจไธ่ตท
o zai yiqi
ๆฏๆๅผๅพๆญกๅ็ไธป้ก
shi zui zhide huanxi de zhuti
Du du
Du~
็ฅๆๅนธ็ฆ ็ฅไฝ ้ๅฟ
zhu wo xingfu zhu ni kaixin
Du du
Du~
่ชชไธๅฅๆญๅๆญๅ
shuo yiju gongxi gongxi
ไธๅฎๆๅฆๆๅฆๆ
yiding hui ruyi ruyi
ๅไนๆฏ่ชช
o yeshi shuo
ๆๆ่ไฝ
wo aizhe ni
ๆฏไธๅฅๅๅๅๅ
mei yiju tong xi tong xi
ๆ่ฌๆๆไฝ ๆไฝ
ganxie wo you ni you ni
ๅๅจไธ่ตท
o zai yiqi
ๆฏๆๅผๅพๆญกๅ็ไธป้ก
shi zui zhide huanxi de zhuti
่ชชไธๅฅๆญๅๆญๅ
shuo yiju gongxi gongxi
ไธๅฎๆๅฆๆๅฆๆ
yiding hui ruyi ruyi
ๅไนๆฏ่ชช
o yeshi shuo
ๆๆ่ไฝ
wo aizhe ni
ๆฏไธๅฅๅๅๅๅ
mei yiju tong xi tong xi
ๆ่ฌๆๆไฝ ๆไฝ
ganxie wo you ni you ni
ๅๅจไธ่ตท
o zai yiqi
ๆฏๆๅผๅพๆญกๅ็ไธป้ก
shi zui zhide huanxi de zhuti
่ชชไธๅฅๆญๅๆญๅ
shuo yiju gongxi gongxi
ไธๅฎๆๅฆๆๅฆๆ
yiding hui ruyi ruyi
ๅไนๆฏ่ชช
o yeshi shuo
ๆๆ่ไฝ
wo aizhe ni
ๆฏไธๅฅๅๅๅๅ
mei yiju tong xi tong xi
ๆ่ฌๆๆไฝ ๆไฝ
ganxie wo you ni you ni
ๅๅจไธ่ตท
o zai yiqi
ๆฏๆๅผๅพๆญกๅ็ไธป้ก
shi zui zhide huanxi de zhuti
English Translation – Source: JSPinyin.net
Du du
Du~
Wish me happiness and wish you happiness
Du du
Du~
New year to happy new year
Itโs another year in spring
Your code
I have the red envelope ready
You make me hug
Long time no see but itโs okay
A bite of glutinous rice balls or dumplings
Itโs the taste of reunion
Congratulations, congratulations to you
Iโm polite
Liduo is no one
Take a picture and laugh at it
Congratulations, congratulations to you
No worries to bother you
Happiness is always with you
Good luck
Say congratulations
Surely wishful
Oh also said
I love you
Every sentence is the same joy and joy
Thank you for having you
Oh together
Is the most joyful theme
Blessing is falling, blessing is coming
Blessed please pick it up
From the door of my home
Post it to the corner of china town
Donโt be too much, donโt be too noisy
Take the phone and turn off the computer
Stay up all night tonight
Go to the market tomorrow to watch the excitement
Congratulations, congratulations to you
Iโm polite
Liduo doesnโt count as an outsider
Take a picture and laugh at it
Congratulations, congratulations to you
No worries to bother you
Happiness is always with you
Good luck
Say congratulations
Surely wishful
Oh also said
I love you
Every sentence is the same joy and joy
Thank you for having you
Oh together
Is the most joyful theme
Du du
Du~
Wish me happiness and wish you happiness
Du du
Du~
Say congratulations
Surely wishful
Oh also said
I love you
Every sentence is the same joy and joy
Thank you for having you
Oh together
Is the most joyful theme
Say congratulations
Surely wishful
Oh also said
I love you
Every sentence is the same joy and joy
Thank you for having you
Oh together
Is the most joyful theme
Say congratulations
Surely wishful
Oh also said
I love you
Every sentence is the same joy and joy
Thank you for having you
Oh together
Is the most joyful theme
Happy New Year