Day 9: Opposite Action:
When you feel like lashing out, or not following through on things that you should be doing, then the DBT skill of “Opposite Action” can help change the course of this experience for the better.
With Opposite Action, you act in a way that is opposite to your emotional urge, e.g. If you feel like lashing out at your partner, then the OppositeAaction would be to show some kindness.
If you’re upset and the other person is also snapping at you, then being kind may seem very counter-intuitive. You don’t have to go to the extreme and be phony with yourself and the other person. Just showing a bit of kindness will do. This helps you both to shift gears and not be stuck in the anger mode. If the other person is not receptive, just breathe, accept that you’ve tried, and don’t let it ruin your day.
Opposite Action is most often recommended when our emotional impulse seems out of proportion to whatever has triggered the emotion. Even when our response is very well in proportion to the trigger, practicing Opposite Action helps to prevent making the situation worse and to regulate our emotions.
Source(s):
Stop Sabotaging: A 31 Day DBT Challenge to Change Your Life
by Debbie Corso